Ferndale Family Sends 3 off to College at Same Time

From a bouncing baby to a terrible toddler to an awkward teenager, parents watch apprehensively as their children grow older. Constantly, one terror is always looming off in the distance: college.

For parents, the anxiety that couples college acceptance letters is a pretty earth-shattering feeling, but for one local family, the anxiety is multiplied – by three.

, which turned their little girl into vice president of the class of 2011, their first boy into a budding artist, and their second boy into a mathematical wiz. The triplets – , , and  – graduated from Ferndale High School with honors. Each is going to a different university: one in state and two out-of-state, leaving the Melnick parents with a very empty nest. 

Both parents, Stephanie and Joe Melnick, agreed the house will be "very, very quiet." They are excited, but with their three teens out of the house, it will be a big change.

Many parents feel the same way as the Melnicks do. Even if it is the last child to go off to school or the first – or even first and last at the same time, like the Melnicks –- a sense of anticipation and anxiety are common and appropriate.

Still, having an empty nest is not always a bad thing. “The grocery bill will certainly decrease,” Stephanie Melnick said.

Getting ready for the college years

Packing for college takes a lot of time and patience. Parents and students should be diligent with checking into what items the college recommends to incoming freshmen. There is also a certain amount of prep work that is required when sending your child off to college, Stephanie Melnick said.

“We’ve been making them do their own laundry for a few months," she said. "We haven’t really ventured into cooking though. The ones that would actually learn to cook already know, and for the others, well, Ramen noodles don’t take much work.”

Parents also need to think about their own travel involved with sending their kids to school, whether it be to an in state or out-of-state institution.

“I have been spending most of my time on the logistics,” Joe Melnick said. “Plane tickets and hotel rooms for parent weekends, Thanksgiving, Christmas and all of the holiday travels.”

Parents may wonder whether having their children stay in state as opposed to out-of-state might lessen the worry that goes along with shipping their kids to school. With Kevin Melnick traveling to New Orleans to attend Tulane University and Chris Melnick going to Milwaukee for Marquette University, Stephanie Melnick shares a common concern with other parents: What will happen in the case of an emergency? 

Joe Melnick, on the other hand, does not think that having two kids out-of-state is that big of an issue.

“We have a few family friends by Kevin and Chris, so that is a comfort," he said. "Plus all of them are half a days worth of travel or less away from home. Natalie won’t be too far at Kalamazoo. We would be able to get to all of them if something happened.” 

The Melnicks said when deciding on a school, it is important to allow their kids to take the reigns and make their own decisions.

“Picking schools is an individual thing. It is important for parents to encourage their kids to broaden their horizons," Stephanie Melnick said.

Michigan is home of some very good institutions, such as University of Michigan, Michigan State, Wayne State, Central, Western and Oakland universities. There are many different places to choose from, however, not everyone’s hungry for adventure and education can be satiated here. 

“We both feel that gathering new experiences from different parts of the country is very valuable," Joe Melnick said.

It differs from kid to kid, as the Melnicks have shown, but they say it is imperative to keep an open mind, no matter how terrible out-of-state tuition sounds to a parent. 

Finally, the Melnicks add, most parents need to be willing to start looking at institutions earlier, rather than later. Regardless of how weary a parent may be to let go, scoping out schools is an advantage to the children.

“Overall, it is pretty odd from a parent’s perspective,” Joe Melnick said. “But the more experience they have to draw on when they are making the final decision, the better their decision will be. It is really all in their hands.”